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So dear friends...

Thu, Dec 15 2022 5:08 PM (148 replies)
  • LizzieRossetti
    1,545 Posts
    Wed, Feb 5 2014 4:25 AM

    So a year to the day ago, I found out I had Acute Myloid Leaukaemia.

    And Today, following a healthy period of remission, I get the call to go back in from my consultant because my remission appears to be over. I could tell you that life sucks, but actually no, no it doesn't. Not when you have had a year of borrowed time, a second chance if you like.

    I knew before the consultant did because two nights ago, my dog sneaked into my bed and curled up beside me, I like to think because he knew, and was just giving me the heads up. Just like he would do last year before I knew.

    Today for me then, is a time to reflect on the wonderful 30 and a bit years I have already enjoyed, and to enjoy the day experiencing all that beauty that lies around us, waiting, waiting for me to notice it. A time to think about all those times I was angry at things that no longer matter, and the people I was upset by, for no real reason, and those whom I upset.

    I would like to think I was serenity itself but yet inside I can feel a thrilling tremble, one that makes my fingers twitch and my mind race, crowded with thoughts, ideas, and yes, dreams, for who yet knows?

    So this is my little note to everyone who still enjoys life without the expectancy, nay certainty of definable death. Be at peace, be placid, and rejoice in what you have for you know not when you will lose it. Send the anger and the rants to a darker place, and simply enjoy your time, tell someone that you love them, and cry freely at beautiful things. Hold tight something that you cannot do without, and think before you speak because you cannot unspeak.

    I would love to think I could patch my scrawl to these pages for a long time yet, but hey, I will try, but my promise is likely to be broken. So dear friends...

     

    Lizzie xx

  • TNP56
    510 Posts
    Wed, Feb 5 2014 5:13 AM

    I am so speechless Liz all I can say is be strong--fight hard--but stay positive & I will think of you everyday with my best wishes & love

  • BubbaSauce
    260 Posts
    Wed, Feb 5 2014 5:25 AM

    Lizzie,

    I don't even know you. Heck, I didn't even know you existed here on WGT. But that touched me.

    My wife and I are going through a lot of troubles of our own. She lost her job last May and still hasn't found a new one. We're on the verge of losing our house and our cars. Our youngest daughter, 16, suffers from severe anxiety and depression (after a childhood of seemingly endless happiness) and our older daughter, 24, can't seem to get her head out of her, you-know-what, and act like a real adult. Add to that, my wife's dad recently had a second leg amputation so now we're saddled with more chores of having to do for him what he now can't do for himself.

    Your words, however, hit home. It's easy to feel overwhelmed in our situation, or to think that it's easy for someone in your position to be able to just let go and appreciate what you have and love what's around you. But what you said is true.

    No matter what happens to us, we still need to appreciate and enjoy what we have. Not that it's going to be easy, but the alternative is to slowly kill ourselves anyway with stress and worry.

    So, take some comfort in knowing that you have touched at least one person. And I will remember your words when I get to feeling down.

    -Rob

  • raycin1019
    377 Posts
    Wed, Feb 5 2014 5:35 AM

    Lizzie, I am so sorry to hear about your situation.  i was diagnosed two years ago with Prostate Cancer.  I scheduled an operation only to be informed that they could not operate because, unknown to me, i was also diabetic.  it was a hard fight for six months to reduce my glucose levels to allow me to have the operation.  Now, two years later, i am cancer free and have my sugar (most of the time) under control. 

    When i received the dual hit two years ago, i was initially crushed.  But after reflection, i realized that i had lived a charmed life.  I was 63 and this was the first time i was ever in a hospital.  I had been married to the most wonderful woman in the world for 42 years.  My son was a fine young gentleman, married to a really nice girl...we even liked her parents.  My grandson was healthy and a real treat to be around.  I realized that my life had been a dream and i was embarassed about feeling sorry for myself.

    When i read your post, those feelings returned.  I can only say that you have my hopes and my prayers that remission will re-occur and you will be able to live a long and happy life.  Please keep us up to date

     

  • mrcaddie
    2,429 Posts
    Wed, Feb 5 2014 7:58 AM

    Lizzie-

    That was the most profoundly moving post I have ever read in these forums.

    I truly wish you all the best.

    Wayne

  • Kurtsbuford
    7,592 Posts
    Wed, Feb 5 2014 11:07 AM

    Lizzie,  you're a beautiful person and a literary genius, so please stay with us!  

  • anobair69
    6 Posts
    Wed, Feb 5 2014 2:03 PM

    Lizzie.

    Your words are very moving and yet I find a strength and dignity in them.

    My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

    May you have warm words on a cold evening.

    A full moon on a dark night, and a smooth road

    all the way to your door.

    David.

  • PaulTon
    10,731 Posts
    Wed, Feb 5 2014 2:39 PM

    LizzieRossetti:
    So this is my little note to everyone who still enjoys life without the expectancy, nay certainty of definable death. Be at peace, be placid, and rejoice in what you have for you know not when you will lose it. Send the anger and the rants to a darker place, and simply enjoy your time, tell someone that you love them, and cry freely at beautiful things. Hold tight something that you cannot do without, and think before you speak because you cannot unspeak.

    One of the best paragraphs I have ever read.

  • renniw52
    5,385 Posts
    Wed, Feb 5 2014 4:57 PM

    Lizzie, we go way back. The first time I ever had the chance to play with you I thought I made the big time. We have had some fun playing, although way to little. I am one of the old Corp players who know you for what you are, what you will always be to us. You are priceless, a part of our lives that cannot be replaced. Keep fighting and stay with us. I have no words that will convey my feelings other than WE LOVE YOU GIRL.

    Rich

  • SweetiePie
    4,925 Posts
    Wed, Feb 5 2014 6:51 PM

    ~LR~

    The irreplaceable. I am too deeply moved to say anything.

    Peace, Grace and Love Forever

    Lily

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