That's a misunderstanding, the option already exists. If you wish to set up a private multi-player game, you only click one player field at a time, selecting specific players for the match.
I believe the experience you're having is unrelated to any specific competition. If you search the forums, you'll see that many players have complained about frequently being booted from random pick-up multi-player games. It's happened to all of us at one point or another.