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Chuck Norris Jokes

• Soulcatcher 1,970 Posts

  Fri, Sep 11 2009 5:13 PM

  Chuck Norris's wife burnt the Thanksgiving dinner. So Chuck ate a turkey, carrots, potatoes..etc.

  5 minutes later he s**t out a perfect Thanksgiving dinner for 10.

  His wife looked at him and said "how did you do that?"

  He roundhoused her to the head and said "Never question Chuck Norris".

• EllisSpice 871 Posts

  Sat, Sep 12 2009 4:21 AM

  Chuck Norris built the hospital he was born in.

  The saddest moment for a child is not when he learns Santa Claus isn't real, it's when he learns Chuck Norris is.

  Chuck Norris does not know where you live, but he knows where you will die.

  http://twitter.com/ChuckFacts

  It hasn't been updated in 2 years, but oh well.

• lilrob88 870 Posts

  Sat, Sep 12 2009 6:11 AM

  Ellis thank you for the link. It was hilarious. People here at work think im crazy now. lol

• Snaike 3,678 Posts

  Sat, Sep 12 2009 11:21 AM

  lilrob?  It took them that long????  Oh my.

• edchavez 488 Posts

  Sat, Sep 12 2009 12:03 PM

  Wow nivlac! Those are pretty funny! Thank you for the laugh! LOL

• werksux 241 Posts

  Tue, May 18 2010 7:36 PM

  Wow, I think nivlac's awesomeness just over shadowed chuck norris!

• lvietri 3,326 Posts

  Tue, May 18 2010 7:38 PM

  Thank You Chuck Norris !!!!!

• lilrob88 870 Posts

  Tue, May 18 2010 7:46 PM

  LOL! Chuck emerges once more!

   

• danohi50 1,020 Posts

  Tue, May 18 2010 11:27 PM

  My favorite!

  Chuck Norris' dog is trained to pick up his own poop because Chuck Norris will not take *** from anyone.

• TarheelsRule 5,471 Posts

  Wed, May 19 2010 10:04 AM

  The web site has all the good ones.  My favorite was always...

  Wilt Chamberlain claimed to have sex with over 10,000 women.....Chuck Norris calls that a slow day.