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A true golfer's life

Tue, Sep 13 2011 5:19 AM (1 replies)
  • jk7m8b
    1 Posts
    Mon, Sep 12 2011 3:50 PM

    In My Hand I Hold A Ball,

    White And Dimpled, And Rather Small.

    Oh, How Bland It Does Appear,

    This Harmless Looking Little Sphere.



    By Its Size I Could Not Guess

    The Awesome Strength It Does Possess.



    But Since I Fell Beneath Its Spell,

    I've Wandered Through The Fires Of Hell.

    My Life Has Not Been Quite The Same

    Since I Chose To Play This Stupid Game.

    It Rules My Mind For Hours On End;

    A Fortune It Has Made Me Spend.

    It Has Made Me Curse And Made Me Cry,

    And Hate Myself And Want To Die.

    It Promises Me A Thing Called Par,

    If I Hit It Straight And Far.



    To Master Such A Tiny Ball,

    Should Not Be Very Hard At All.

    But My Desires The Ball Refuses,

    And Does Exactly As It Chooses.



    It Hooks And Slices, Dribbles And Dies,

    And Disappears Before My Eyes.

    Often It Will Have A Whim,

    To Hit A Tree Or Take A Swim.



    With Miles Of Grass On Which To Land,

    It Finds A Tiny Patch Of Sand.

    Then Has Me Offering Up My Soul,

    If Only It Would Find The Hole.



    It's Made Me Whimper Like A Pup,

    And Swear That I Will Give It Up.

    And Take To Drink To Ease My Sorrow,

    But The Ball Knows ... I'll Be Back Tomorrow.



    _______________________________________________________



    Stand proud you noble swingers of clubs And losers of balls!



    A recent study found that the average golfer Walks about 900 miles a year.



    Another study found that golfers drink, on Average, 22 gallons of alcohol a year.



    This means that, on average, golfers get about

    41 miles to the gallon!



    Kind of makes you proud. Almost makes you Feel like a hybrid. . ..

  • joelacoste
    9 Posts
    Tue, Sep 13 2011 5:19 AM

    That was very funny and oh so true! Thanks for sharing...................

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