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what is vem and what does it do?

Fri, Nov 4 2022 11:11 AM (26 replies)
  • LizzieRossetti
    1,545 Posts
    Mon, Aug 8 2011 9:45 AM

    She is your lover she is your friend, her caress soothes an aching heart, her kiss behind the ear is a whisper heaven sent, her breath upon your cheek speaks of pleasure beyond endure. You feel her ever near and know to her you will yield, her siren call so strong from across a crowded room a silent whispered call, "I want you" mouthed by lip and look alone, a loop of golden tress, hooked over deft and clever so, says all you need to know. You feel so strong and proud with her gentle acquiesce, and boldly stride strident out, heart pounding in your breast, hope enlivened clear you tell her she must not fear, and you miss the curl of simper smile, the look she casts away, lost now in her grip, lost and glad forsooth.

    You cannot remember aye, those early days of bliss, when every shot you made, was rewarded with her kiss, the days when wind was foul, yet never did you miss, and all the while you hover, twixt this world and the next, for in her silken talons, she carries you to her nest. Helpless now to falter, nor take a backward step, your fate was sealed and long ago, from her sweet embrace, you no longer care to flee, and she looks out upon you now, that smile a smile of glee.

    Still you must not wonder, nor ever question so, her ways you took to heart when you were set to go. VEM is all of this, and wonders never cease, this she that holds you now, and will not, will not bring you peace.


    Lizzie xx

    270 Posts
    Mon, Aug 8 2011 10:42 AM

    i won't be able to putt for two weeks.

  • Cleworthy
    3,466 Posts
    Mon, Aug 8 2011 12:07 PM

    I always enjoy Ms Lizzie's posts.  She is without doubt a treasure to us all and should be designated our official WGT Poet.  It made me wonder, since I am currently trying to figure out a reliable way to make par on #9 at OCC (with much frustration and gnashing of teeth), whether Lizzie could turn her considerable poetic talent to give us an ode to Oakmont #9?  The black hole of despair...

    C   :-)   

  • LizzieRossetti
    1,545 Posts
    Mon, Aug 8 2011 1:46 PM


                  Lizzies Lament


    Bright the day and too my look, it was

    Spirit alight and too my smile,because

    Sunbeams lanced like merry spear they did

    And dappled leaf danced with nothing hid

    Unsheathed agleam, a stick, a pole the ball to hit

    My dream then as I drew, that in the hole an easy fit.


    Single soar behind the glocken hollow whack,

    I'm sure I heard a whistle, and a crisp clean crack

    There was nought of any offend, where ball did final land

    Nowhere near the rough, the fescue or the sand

    The birds were all a twitter, and so my heart leapt too

    Never was a drive so fine and oh so very true


    Cupping hand above my brow, I spied the yonder green

    Never yet this close and straight, had I ever been

    There was nothing in the way, save some feet or ten

    This was why I picked, the wedge that I chose then,

    My partner only glared, for his shot had sadness writ,

    And fallen by the side, deep in that wiley old sandpit


    Well like one always must, I watched as his flew wide

    A smile of rue from he, as the ball ran down the side

    A stance I took and careful did my shot I aim

    This time as before, and hoped for outcome same

    My backswing failed me not, the loft I had just right

    Imagine then my surprise, as ball ran out of sight


    My gay step that started out, had left me at this time

    And clouds they gathered round, and took out all the shine

    Behind me I could hear, mirth bad held in I swear

    Pretended me not to know, and showed by flick of hair

    Still trudged ahead, my grimace pained me so

    All the way up and up, as far as I could go


    Sitting smiling up, a grin in every dimple

    I saw my ball right then, and believed the lie not simple

    My turn now for I was farthest out

    To commune with he, I surely would have the need of shout

    With luck I might just see the pin, thirty feet of drop I saw

    And a hundred ten little feet, to compliment my dropping jaw


    Now I have seen the lightening, and cars that go so quick

    But ne'er have I seen, a golf ball faster still, and oh so very slick

    Now my partner turned, so his laughter would not smirch

    As into rough I ventured, the long grass to tickle at my skirts

    My fourth no better played, indeed I vented a little temper mood

    For not two feet hence, was my smiling ball steady glued


    And so my fifth, before e'er my partner played a third

    Was taken swift without a care, and not as I preferred

    Finally and  at last, the hole was almost done

    After six, I can tell you it became no more fun




    Lizzie xx :-)

  • singingjesus
    152 Posts
    Mon, Aug 8 2011 3:53 PM

    Bravo! A true revealing of vem and OCC #9. Thank you!


  • Cleworthy
    3,466 Posts
    Tue, Aug 9 2011 7:33 AM

    Ah, Lizzie!  You have perfectly captured the hope and confidence we all have on the 9th tee of OCC, and how it quickly turns to despair and frustration on the green.  I just played a lay-up to the front left, chipped on and promptly 4-putted for a triple.  How cool is that?

    Thank you for giving us a lighter heart as we beat our heads and bloody our fists on OCC 9.  C

  • anthonyvp1
    212 Posts
    Thu, Aug 11 2011 7:52 PM

    FOLKS!....THIS IS the closest I've come to finding what I hear when The VEM masters speak on the subject.

    When I am hitting on all cylinders I DO NOT want an outside force to change the outcome of my hitting the ball other than what is stated BEFORE I hit the ball.

  • Topcat488
    172 Posts
    Fri, Aug 12 2011 7:33 AM



    When I am hitting on all cylinders I DO NOT want an outside force to change the outcome of my hitting the ball other than what is stated BEFORE I hit the ball.


    I agree 100%, I would play more rounds, spend more money, and tell all my friends at my job about the wonderful online golf game I found.... But this game only frustrates me before i leave for work!!! WGT, let my people go... Making Birdies or Eagles is fun... Missing 5ft to 7ft putts because of VEM is not. It's a video game, if -20 is unrealistic it's because it's video, no matter how hard you try at WGT, unless we pick up our clubs and go to the courses, it'll never be real.  PS.  I edited this to uncheck the Email me replies box... Now let the people go... too have fun :)

  • YankeeJim
    25,827 Posts
    Fri, Aug 12 2011 9:24 AM

    When I am hitting on all cylinders I DO NOT want an outside force to change the outcome of my hitting the ball

    Then go get yourself a turbo encabulator.   :-D

  • anthonyvp1
    212 Posts
    Fri, Aug 12 2011 6:03 PM

    ...trying to be as clear to all as anyone who ever voiced an opinion on the VEM.....................just sayin' :)