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Re: Quitting

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Sat, Apr 17 2010 12:46 AM (8 replies)
  • salamii
    1,058 Posts
    Fri, Apr 16 2010 7:27 AM

    10 reasons that let you know it's time to quit.

    1. You have had three putts and your group members tell you that your still away.

    2. You can remember for a week the one good shot you had in the round.

    3. The ball retriever is the most often used piece of equipment in your bag.

    4. You and your group have rules for Mulligans.

    5. You have more than the regulation 14 clubs in your bag including 3 putters.

    6. You leave the pin in when you are on the fringe 8 feet from the pin in the hope it will stop your ball.

    7. You have the thought you that if you hole out from 140 yards you can still make bogie.

    8. The starter leaves a one hour gap after your tee off time.

    9. When you call fore on a par three, and everyone runs to the green for safety.

    10. The club has named a pond in front of the green after you.

  • lvietri
    3,326 Posts
    Fri, Apr 16 2010 7:30 AM

    Nice Sal ... one more to add ....

    Icon starts to look good to you.   TIME TO QUIT.

  • SystemCrash
    209 Posts
    Fri, Apr 16 2010 7:52 AM

    salamii:
    9. When you call fore on a par three, and everyone runs to the green for safety.

    LOL... I like this one! :-)

    Rob

  • blackbeard
    288 Posts
    Fri, Apr 16 2010 8:28 AM

    Your knees are knocking over that 3 ft putt for triple bogey - your best hole so far

  • Snaike
    3,678 Posts
    Fri, Apr 16 2010 9:28 AM

    I ~KNEW~ there was something about that single that joined our threesome last weekend!!!  Sal!  That was you!!

    That's a great memory you have.  I never saw you once taking notes (especially about our "Mulligan Rules").

    Oh, and sorry about hitting you on the 4th tee...  I told you the safest place to stand when I'm driving is in front of me, but you wouldn't listen or thought I was kidding...  Hope that heals soon.

    Peace.

  • salamii
    1,058 Posts
    Fri, Apr 16 2010 11:28 AM

    this is from a friend of mine.

    POSTED AT LOCAL GOLF CLUB

    1. BACK STRAIGHT, KNEES BENT, FEET SHOULDER WIDTH APART
    2. FORM A LOOSE GRIP
    3. KEEP YOUR HEAD DOWN
    4. AVOID A QUICK BACK SWING
    5. STAY OUT OF THE WATER
    6. TRY NOT TO HIT ANY ONE
    7. IF YOU ARE TAKING TOO LONG, PLEASE LET OTHERS GO AHEAD OF YOU
    8. DON'T STAND DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF OTHERS
    9. QUIET PLEASE...... WHILE OTHERS ARE PREPARING TO GO
    10. DON'T TAKE EXTRA STROKES
    11. VERY GOOD. NOW FLUSH THE URINAL, GO OUTSIDE, AND TEE OFF

     

  • salamii
    1,058 Posts
    Fri, Apr 16 2010 4:38 PM

    bump

  • salamii
    1,058 Posts
    Fri, Apr 16 2010 7:06 PM

    OK people, just received another. I promise it's the last one.

    Four married guys go golfing. During the 4th hole the following
    conversation took place:
    First Guy: You have no idea what I had to do to be able to come out
    golfing this weekend. I had to promise my wife that I will paint every
    room in the house next weekend.

    Second Guy: That’s nothing, I had to promise my wife that I will build
    her a new deck for the pool.

    Third Guy: Man, you both have it easy! I had to promise my wife that I
    will remodel the kitchen for her.

    They continue to play the hole when they realized that the fourth guy has
    not said a word. So they ask him, You haven’t said anything about what
    you had to do to be able to come golfing this weekend. What’s the deal?

    Fourth Guy: I just set my alarm for 5:30a.m., When it goes off, I shut
    off my alarm, give the wife a budge and say, ‘Golf Course or Intercourse?’
    So she says, Wear your sweater.

  • VanHalenLover
    1,422 Posts
    Sat, Apr 17 2010 12:46 AM

    I handle it differently, I take my wife golfing with me.

    It worked awesome until late last summer. One round she was getting eaten alive by mosquitoes, and we had no bug spray. We decided not to make the turn, and headed for the clubhouse. When we got in, the club pro was nice enough to say hi and ask how our round went. Without hesitating, my wife told him it was great, but she got bitten by said mosquitoes between the first and second holes, and wished there was something he could do about it.

    Almost as if I had it all planned, and I get blamed for it to this day, the club pro looked her and said, 'Ma'am, I think you need to shorten your stance up a bit'

    Now I get to go golfing by myself whenever I wish..

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