Dr Moose! I see you too have been snecknickled, it's a scourge and must perforce be nulled.
I suggest we borrow Yancy Mans round table and put it to good use.
I have some glue left from an earlier esperiment'e which would be more than useful in securing a volunteer or Lambert by his jacket to its underside while I tow the table behind my trusted R22 over affected areas, leaving the man free to gesticulate wildly ( and not without justification if you can imagine the scene ) and shout the purest of obscenities at heinous perpetrators far below. It would be like the voice of a higher being from above raining down brimstone and stuff, or at least some half bricks ( also known as "half Charlies" ) which were left over from the Napoleonic prisoners of Wars efforts at erecting a nine mile wall around the pile. This is to be distinguished from Nine Mile Burn in Midlothian, which itself should not be taken as an invite to recklessly speed at speeds over 90mph ( 223kph more or less but the distinction isn't required ) along the A702. Unless you want a ticket and an unintelligible telling off from the local constabulary.
Now I know that the pundits among you will be quick to leap to the assertion that an R22 was not designed to carry such weight, other than two persons of no more than 220kg combined weight, but here's a fact about that very thing.
I have in my bureau draw the original Pilot Manual, and it clearly does not state anywhere that I or anyone should be barred from towing tables through the air, and more specifically, if specificity was required, it definitely does NOT say "Lizzie Rossetti may not tow stuff with this helicopter" And so I draw the only conclusion that one can possibly draw, and that is, that it is entirely alright for me to tow whatever I wish.
Which I am sure every one will agree, is reason enough to take the fight against Snickklitters to the very people perpetuating pernicious pragmany purposely.
Like Margaret Churchill said, " We will fight them within our reaches, and we will NEVER subpoena "
More or less.
Lizzie xx