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Dear Pabby

Mon, Dec 13 2021 8:56 AM (251 replies)
  • pmm711
    5,646 Posts
    Sun, Jan 15 2017 6:47 AM

    opyeuclid:

    pmm711:
    So since you're not sure what's living under your couch you'll have to approach it slowly with something extremely enticing...since you're in the USA use the universal favorite food...a french fry...

    Dear Pabby .

    Wanting not to end up in the green room ( I was a child of the late 60s early 70s and prefur the black light ) I went is search of french fyies ,  stoped at McDougles and on the way home I ate a few , They must have changed the fryin oil to one of them healthy ones cause the fries tasted like **** . So not wanting to piss of what ever lives under the couch with **** tasting fries I went to burger queen and got some and onion rings , Made sure I tasted them also and they were better ,  But wanting to make sure I stopped at several other fast food joints , After tasting all them fries I was full to the gills , I made one last stop at a little bar to have a beer or two to get my courge up . 1or 2 turned into 12 and and I was ready to take on any thing , I tasted all the cold fries one last time and that didnt go well ,  Mixing cold fries and two many beers caused me to get sick in the drive way and toss guts up . then things went light out .

    I woke up in the back yard the next day and was not going to offer day old fries to what ever lives under the couch with the head pounding , 

    Long story short , Took some asprin and a shower went to Toys be Us and got a new box of crayons .

    OPY

    OPY-wan Kenobi,

    I was quite impressed by your fortitude in searching for the perfect "enticer".  The little bar was also an excellent idea...been there done that.  I have a saying when it comes to drinking, "One's a plenty, two's too many, three's not half enough".  I see you and I agree on that note...LOL

    Now I still have a question...did you check for A BEAST?  What if there is one under that couch of yours? 

    Sure your Yancy/alien coloring is back on track but I'm going to worry about you until we know your feet are safe should you want to sit down on that couch with that adult coloring book of yours.

    I think you need an alternative plan since buying fries seemed to test your ability to stay focused on the task at hand.  I think you should buy one of those $75 flashlights from those infomercials...you know the TacLight from Bell&Howell...the one with the beam that can be seen from outer space. (also known as a Yancy Spotter).  You know...one of these...

    ****IMPORTANT NOTE**** Please do the BOGO (buy 1 get 1) deal and send me the free one since I'm helping you on this issue.  PM me for my address.

    Now...when your shipment arrives...Turn off your lights in that room and with that TacLight you can lie down on your floor way across from the couch and shine that spotlight under there to see if just the 2 pieces of crayon are under there.  Shine all over...from one end to the other and back and forth a few times.  Change speeds of your swiping arm movement as creatures who do live under couches tend to be fast.  You must ensure you do this step diligently.  If you happen to spot a stray pair of panties, bud of weed, etc. those things are OK.  Don't ley Yancy's beliefs of silk & sticky buds being from the dark side alarm you.  He's wrong...trust me on this one. If all is clear then please let me know ASAP.  I won't be able to sleep until I know all has been given the A-OK from you.

    But, if you see two glowing objects staring back at you...something similar to this...

    well...your in deep chit.  Vacate the premises at once and go back to the initial plan and go get some french fries.  REPEAT...Vacate the premises at once and go back to the initial plan and go get some french fries. DO NOT PASS GO...DO NOT COLLECT $200.  Get the F%$^%#^ out of there.

    I hope to hear an update PRONTO.

    Good Luck! (with getting expedited shipping on those TacLights for less than 3 times the cost of the flashlights themselves)

    Pabby



  • pmm711
    5,646 Posts
    Sun, Jan 15 2017 6:55 AM

    renniw52:

    Pabby, you have way more patience than I do. OMG

    Nutz,

    Si senor!

    Good Luck! (with getting back the $ you laid out for the gun, ammo, and plane ticket to the next Patriots' game)

    Pabby

  • pmm711
    5,646 Posts
    Sun, Jan 15 2017 7:08 AM

    craigswan:

    Dear pabby '

    As you know st andrews the home of golf where they first started playing in  the year AD 357 have called in their sponsor the greek monks to try and bring golf into the 21st century.

    The Old Course only used to have eleven holes. These were played as eleven holes out and then the same eleven holes in, making it a twenty two hole golf course. They are thinking of introducing this again for 2018 . I know the 18 hole round was brought in because that was how long it took the scots to drink a bottle of whiskey but after brexit times are tough .

    How do you think this will affect wgt players . Maybe we will all become tour champions at level 25 . Missing out the bunker hole on the seventeenth will help us all .

    Craig,

    It will only affect play on St. Andrews on Sundays when a tournament isn't being played there.  And every day at WGT is considered a Sunday (God's day of rest).

    Good Luck! (with altering the course of future history here on WGT)

    Pabby

  • pmm711
    5,646 Posts
    Sun, Jan 15 2017 7:16 AM

    WigerToods2010:

    Dear Pabby,

    About that tree...

    :-)

    Wiger,

    The tree survived...the fire hydrant did not.  And that tree...cost a lot of $ to take down.  Nike "Just Did It"...to you.

    Good Luck! (with regaining any form every again...in and out of the bedroom)

    Pabby

  • pmm711
    5,646 Posts
    Sun, Jan 15 2017 7:35 AM

    alcaucin:

    Dear Pabby..

    I only seem to be able to putt well when.... Aroused 

    What do you suggest ?

    Andy

    ( making my own jokes up here ;-/ )

    Andy,

    This one is easy...

    Golf with her...

    or her...

    or her...

    or her...

    In other words..."Golf with me".

    Good Luck! (with finding a Mrs. as smok'in hot as mine)

    Pabby

    P.S. I'd post a pic...but we all know what Craig would do with it.


  • craigswan
    31,576 Posts
    Sun, Jan 15 2017 1:32 PM

    P.S. I'd post a pic...but we all know what Craig would do with it.

    What;s wrong with blowing it up to A3 size and using it as miss february .

  • renniw52
    5,385 Posts
    Sun, Jan 15 2017 1:44 PM

    Pabby, I would not spend a dime to go to a Pats game. I am a Pittsburgh guy dyed in the wool.  Been that all my life. Was even offered high dollar tickets to the game tonight. All I had to do was get there. I knew some of  the old Iron curtain who are wearing 4 rings. And the QB who got them there.

  • renniw52
    5,385 Posts
    Sun, Jan 15 2017 1:46 PM

     Can some people F--- this thread up anymore than they already have?

  • opyeuclid
    6,709 Posts
    Sun, Jan 15 2017 4:41 PM

    pmm711:

    I think you need an alternative plan since buying fries seemed to test your ability to stay focused on the task at hand.  I think you should buy one of those $75 flashlights from those infomercials...you know the TacLight from Bell&Howell...the one with the beam that can be seen from outer space. (also known as a Yancy Spotter).  You know...one of these...

    Gear Pabby .

    I have seen that add befor , So I spent most of last night sitting infront of my 13in B+W tv , I even put some Xtra tin foil on the rabbit ears .  after some time of of turning the knob from chanel 3 to 5 then 8 and back searching for that flash light add . After getting a blister on my finger from turning the knob so much I got the Idea that I might find it on the interweb .

    After logging on to my AOL dial up ( My choice of browsers for playing WGT for the bestest smoothes meeeter ) I found many offers ,  I reached into my pocket for my lunch $ and only had a wooden nickel , lint , and a bar tab ,  ( looks like i paid for some rounds for new friends that I dont know ) .  So I could not order a flash light .

    I am going to think out side the Box .  I have a Birthday candel from a friend called FrankO  saved for my  8 years here in the next few days  and just might light it up tonight and find what I need to know .

    OPY

     

  • drmoose
    3,538 Posts
    Sun, Jan 15 2017 6:34 PM

    Opy,

    If I may interject just a mere word of caution, before lighting any candles from our mutual friend Frapp, be sure to check wind direction as to stay downwind of any authorities, unless you've been medically approved, or, reside in a state where recreational use is allowed.

    Doc :)

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