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There is no stupid question

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Sun, Jun 2 2019 3:24 AM (28 replies)
  • craigswan
    30,953 Posts
    Thu, May 2 2019 4:26 AM

    (It’s our company’s annual Golf Day. It’s a fun event. Basically, we get to golf all afternoon at a reduced price, then eat a nice dinner.)

    Event Organizer: “[My Name], could you do me a big favour?”

    Me: “Well, I was just about to start golfing—”

    Event Organizer: “I know, but the other person organizing Golf Day is stuck in traffic, and I need help assigning everyone to their golf carts and making sure that they’re supplied with bottled water. It’ll take about 30 minutes.”

    Me: “Uh… Okay, I guess.”

    Event Organizer: “Thanks!” *leaves*

    Me: “Wait! What exactly do I do?”

    Event Organizer: “You’ll figure it out.”

    (I did my best, but because I hadn’t done this before, I was slow – plus, I was unable to get everyone their bottled water before their tee-off time. Some people were visibly annoyed. I got very stressed and upset, and the people I was supposed to be golfing with weren’t impressed to be delayed. Still, it all turned out well in the end – or so I thought. Two days later:)

    Event Organizer: “Uh, hi, [My Name]. I’m really sorry to tell you this, but you might be getting a call from HR.”

    Me: “What? Why?”

    Event Organizer: “Apparently, you missed supplying a couple of golf carts with their bottled water. One of the retirees was really angry, and she told me she was going to call HR to complain about you.”

    Me: “I can’t believe this. She got that angry over a free water that maybe cost fifty cents?”

    Event Organizer: “Well, she’s a retiree. Maybe she has nothing better to do with her time.”

  • craigswan
    30,953 Posts
    Thu, May 2 2019 4:29 AM

    (I am working as a ranger on a busy Sunday. All of the tee times are taken for the entire day. Even though the course is full, the pace of play is still at four hours because the course uses ten-minute tee times. As I come up to the eleventh tee, a customer is practice swinging his driver while waiting for the group in front of him move to the green. The customer walks over to me.)

    Customer: “I want to play through the group ahead of us.”

    Me: *politely* “I am sorry, sir, but that is not an option. The course is full and there is no group that is out of position.”

    Customer: “I know the owner of the course and he would let my group play through.”

    Me: “I know the owner quite well myself, and your group will not be able to play through.”

    (He turns his back to me and starts swearing every swear word known to man. His swearing does not bother me because he’s not directing his comments to me. His three other playing partners never say a word to me and look content drinking a cold beverage while waiting their turn. All of a sudden, he quickly turns around and starts walking towards me in a fast pace with his driver in his hand. He has a crazy look in his eyes as he approaches and I prepare myself for an angry confrontation.)

    Customer: *screaming* “I have a date today and if I am late for my date, I am going to have my girlfriend call you to yell at you!”

    Me: *without hesitation* “Is your girlfriend hot? If she is, I will give you my number. Have her call me.”

    (The three men on the carts busted up laughing. The man with the golf club never said another word for the rest of the day.)

  • craigswan
    30,953 Posts
    Thu, May 2 2019 12:05 PM

    A stupid question .

    I usually play in the club clashes .

    Being from uk I usually set up a game or 2 when the americans are sleeping.

    Today I was busy and didn't set up any games .

    When I logged on our cc had finished 2 games .

    The scores in both games were zero - zero .

    So who set the games up . Them or us .

  • santa084
    114 Posts
    Thu, May 2 2019 7:07 PM

    craigswan:

    Why does Yoghurt taste sweeter when eaten with a white spoon.

    Now that's a stupid question.  Lol    :∆{)

  • craigswan
    30,953 Posts
    Fri, May 3 2019 2:10 PM

    image for New Study Shows People Unwilling to Read Overly Long Head

    It's acronyms like this one that catch the eye of the modem-day reader.

    A new study showed that in this, the age of sound bites and bullet points, readers are unwilling to read headlines or even sentences longer than a few words .

    "We almost have to use acronyms for everything," ."Even if they're totally obscure or we just make them up, no one ever asks us what they mean. FYI I don't think they really care."

    Nor do modern readers seem to have much use for insightful, tie-it-all-together closing statements - possibly because they rarely, if ever, make it to the actual end of the thingy .

     

  • craigswan
    30,953 Posts
    Tue, May 21 2019 12:24 AM

    What flavour ice cream is this .

  • craigswan
    30,953 Posts
    Fri, May 24 2019 12:08 PM

    Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch.

    Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote.

  • craigswan
    30,953 Posts
    Sun, Jun 2 2019 3:24 AM

    Why can Hedgehogs swim but Sonic the Hedgehog can't.

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