skip nav

Forums

Golf with Mr Caddie fall 2018

Thu, Dec 6 2018 6:52 PM by pdb1. 21 replies.
  • renniw52 United States
    5,377 Posts
    Sat, Nov 3 2018 9:03 AM

     One day, God willing, I will meet you gents. Sounds like a great time to me.

    Squirrel Nutz

    Digg
    Delicious
  • WigerToods2010 United Kingdom
    7,663 Posts
    Sat, Nov 3 2018 9:32 AM

    mrcaddie:

    conveyorguy:
    waiting on Joe to post some pics....

    Sorry Mike, that's never going to happen because Joe doesn't know how to post pics (LOL) so I thought I'd jump on and post two photos.

    First let me say that like playing with Lou and David at Bethpage and meeting YankeeJim and drmoose in Cooperstown...Erik (eingmund) and I (up to a certain point, more latter) had a great time meeting up with conveyorguy (Mike) and gonfission (Joe) on Monday of this week and playing golf IRL.

    We played at Richmond CC in Richmond, RI. It's a beautiful course set in the middle of a pine forest and although it rained the night before and into the morning the grounds crew were there first thing in the morning using leaf blowers to dry out the greens and we were really appreciative of that.

    Erik and I had a great time with these guys, they are funny as hell and good golfers. On the front nine we were having so much fun, there was laughter all around. The back nine was a little different.

    On about the 11th or 12th hole ( I can't remember) I experienced the most freakish accident any of us have ever heard of in golf to myself (other than getting dragged into a pond by an alligator). My fellow players have been sworn to secrecy not to disclose what happened so don't ask (because I know where they live)...let's just say that's going to cost me between $3000 and $10,000 to fix what happened to me.

    I quit playing after this accident and thought the guys would be bummed that I dropped out of the game but they were real troopers. Erik, Joe and Mike completely understood how I felt (completely embarrassed)  and were totally cool with me just riding in the cart for the rest of the day and watching them play. Thanks guys!

    With that said, I can't wait to get together with these guys again in the Spring.

    Here are some pics-

    L-R-- eingmund, mrcaddie, gonfission and conveyorguy

    This is me with Mike's Andyson's repair tool, my Andyson's hat marker and the flag from Richmond CC-

    That's it guys. I'll play golf with these guys any day of the week.

    MC

    Superb stuff right there, Wayne.

    Great read and terrifying  terrific pictures, too.

    :)

    Digg
    Delicious
  • gonfission United States
    1,416 Posts
    Sat, Nov 3 2018 2:47 PM

    conveyorguy:
    waiting on Joe to post some pics....

    Sorry Mike, that's never going to happen because Joe doesn't know how to post pics (LOL) so I thought I'd jump on and post two photos.

    Psychology 101

    Just be lackadaisical in life, and others have to do your work for you. LOL

    There was nothing but lackadaisical thoughts, as the four horseman of the apocalypse, converged upon Richmond CC, In Rhode Island. Thoughts soon became reality, once the mayhem began.

    The greens, as Wayne said, were wet with morning dew. MMMMM, morning dew...

    The first putt of the day, was hysterical, and a fore told vision, from the humor Gods, for what was about to unfold. A rooster tail approximately 18 inches, ( That;s 45.72 centimeters for the uninitiated) of water, was ascended into the air. I believe we were the second group to tee off for the day.

    The foot prints from the group before us, were prevalent through the front 9. The upside of that scenario was, the lines, the balls created, were a very good indicator of how the greens played.

    Made no difference to me, what so ever.

    Call it cheating if you will. However, I call it good management, to pay attention, to such things. Most of you that know me, know I have an attention span of that gnat, in the other thread. The gnat has a slight advantage over me, as these three gents will attest to, in a court of law, if applicable... ;))

    Just to prove this point, I noticed 2 days ago, while on my home course, I left my 7 iron, leaning against a tree, in Richmond, while I was enjoying the sounds of running water. Yeah, I was taking a pi-ss. Absentmindedly as I am, I walked away and left it holding up a massive pine tree. Oh well...

    As we were kind of feeling each other out, we approached the second tee. We decided to let the twosome behind us, and closing fast, play through.

    I figured no time like the present, to break the ice, and let the real Joe run wild & free, from all that is courteous, and upstanding. You know, just be me.

    Mike was safe, as he & I had met on two prior occasions. He knew what he was walking into.

    Well this is what walked onto the second tee >

    I was mortified, as my pink flamingo pants had not been hemmed yet. I was jealous as heck. To break the ice, I offered the guy $500.00 initially, for his pants. After all, I just wanted to see him walk away in his underwear. Psychology 102. He flat out refused.

    So being the persistent pri-ck that I can be, I then offered him $250.00, for one leg......

    Laughter ensued, the stage was set for epic fun, and the guy flat out refused me again. What a mumpsimus.

    We were soon on our way, to relentless, absurdly irresponsible, shenanigans. We managed to fit some fun in as well.

    The only way to golf.

    If one was punished by as shot, all, fell lockstep & key, into the same purgatory somewhere along the way.

    This was a recurring nightmare for all of us...

    So much for not being able to post a picture, eh? LMFBO Good one Wayne...

    Now, being the over confident putz I endeavor to be, in the second picture up, I tried to ricochet the ball off the tree into one behind me, hoping for a second ricochet, out of the schmeck, or at least within clear shooting distance, of the cup.

    All attention was funneled into the thoughts of protecting my balls. Not the ones in the bag, I might add. 

    No chance. I had a better chance of waiting for the second coming, and ask a friend to turn wood into, well, into not wood, I guess. Didn't happen. Two very precarious hits later, the ball was STILL IN THE SAME PLACE!

    So much for being the hero. Right after that, the skies opened up, and knowledge of the golf Gods was imparted down upon me, like a sack of cement. See how Wayne deals with conflict.

    I THINK, no proof, however, he managed to put this bad daddy on the green for a par, from that very spot.. WTF!?

    I think Judge Smails may have tripped over his (Wayne's) ball, when he extracted himself from the forest, allowing Wayne, a tiny bit of relief, tiny my ass. ;))

    Oh, and that's not all Wayne had mysterious Godlike help with. Check this out >

     That ball right there, is NOT at the bottom of the cup. It has impaled itself just above the cup top, & into the actual green's grass, while being held fast, by the stick. That shot, was traversing a mega sand trap, and, about 75 yards out.

    I call hokey pokey on that one, for sure. If its not at the bottom of the cup, is it really in the cup? One for a lengthy discussion someday.

    Who the heck gets away with this crap, CONSTANTLY!? The ONLY upside of this, was my putt was sucked in by the small indenture his ball made. I'm telling you. I had to rethink if I wanted to continue with this miraculously, savage beat down, he was GLADLY bestowing upon our poor souls.

    The greens began to dry out. The sun came out to play, as well. So, all was good at the Richmond CC for the rest of the day.

    Well, at least till the shot that stood the golfing community on it's head, happened. In complete wonderment, we all just shook our heads, wondering, if what had just transpired, was actually real. I am prone to a few LSD flashbacks, on occasion, so, I could not be sure, I was witnessing reality. I referred to my counterparts, to assure me, that I was in fact, witnessing something rare, & real...

    I promised never to spill the proverbial beans. Y'all can let your imaginations run completely amok, I will say, what we all witnessed, was a first, in the history of golf.

    I would bet my life, it will also be the last.

    I thought I would leave a lasting impression on these boys. NOPE! Not me, Wayne managed something that if we told Y'all, it would be cast off as incompressible, & completely unbelievable poppycock.

    Since we are all golfers of the highest magnitude here, I will not sully our reputations, with possible inveigling discussions.

    The entire event, somehow managed to exceed even my expectations, at every turn of the cart. I can say, that I prefer to golf around pine trees, as the OCCASIONAL times I found my self in the woods, branching out my awesomeness, it is very easy to spot your ball on top of pine needles, instead of under maple, oaks, etc. tree debris.

    Not to make Y'all to think this was all about Wayne, as we all had nefarious shots run completely out of control, Erik, Mike, & myself had plenty of trials & tribulations to go around.

    Wayne's recoveries, were just way more noteworthy, that the rest of us. Erik & Wayne were on average better golfers that day. Mike was in his zone as well, that's a good place, until his slice STOPPED! LMFAO

    Mike & Wayne, have a slice to beat the band. They both play into it like pro's. Until, serendipitously, they go straight as pi-ss, into the woods on the left. I recall Mike playing one hole to the right of us backwards the WHOLE WAY down, until he crossed over, (Yeah, he crossed over alright) to the green for a flipping BOGEY!!

    It was hands down, the best damn game of FU-CK ME, I've ever played......

    When the trumpet of golf sends its resounding call, you can bet your bottom dollar, & pants, I'll be there, to play these gentleman in perpetuity.

    WigerToods2010:
    Great read and terrifying  terrific pictures, too.

    You ^^^, you're next bruv... I see a double crossing of the pond, in the very near future.

    Elvis has left the building...

    Joe

    ☢---------------------<*{{{{{-(

     

     

     

     

     

     

    Digg
    Delicious
  • garyk49 United States
    1,550 Posts
    Sun, Nov 4 2018 4:32 PM

     

    ↑↑↑↑↑↑↑↑

    Joe, outstanding read.

    Digg
    Delicious
  • opyeuclid United States
    5,912 Posts
    Sun, Nov 4 2018 5:03 PM

    Thank You .

    OPY

    Digg
    Delicious
  • WigerToods2010 United Kingdom
    7,663 Posts
    Mon, Nov 5 2018 3:51 AM

    Hahahaha! Sides aching here...  super stuff, Joe.

    Just a few wee niggly questions - no, not THAT one, Wayne.

    gonfission:
    Just to prove this point, I noticed 2 days ago, while on my home course, I left my 7 iron, leaning against a tree, in Richmond, while I was enjoying the sounds of running water. Yeah, I was taking a pi-ss. Absentmindedly as I am, I walked away and left it holding up a massive pine tree. Oh well...

    You are, of course, referring to the 7 iron?!?!?!  :)

    gonfission:
    Well this is what walked onto the second tee...

    Not sure if you meant the jazz pants or Rory "enjoying the sound of running water" in the background...

     

    Going by the group's obvious fondness for the scenic routes and and their love of tall woodland plants, I'm wondering if US customs may have any issues with my 14th club being a chainsaw?

    At least you folk managed to stay at ground level. I tend to set my aims that wee bit higher (literally) and have the scars to prove it:

     

    gonfission:
    you're next bruv... I see a double crossing of the pond, in the very near future.

    Now that would be simply awesome!... Slicers "R" Us Inc. pfft.

    Finally...

    gonfission:
    as the four horseman of the apocalypse, converged upon Richmond CC, In Rhode Island.

    Did this ages ago for a CC event- seems apt for you and the gang:

     

    Awra best meantime.

    👍

     

     

    Digg
    Delicious
  • gonfission United States
    1,416 Posts
    Mon, Nov 5 2018 12:37 PM

    Thanks Gary. Nice of you to say that

    Only you Johnny, only you... LMFAO

    WigerToods2010:
    You are, of course, referring to the 7 iron?!?!?!  :)

    Well first, I had to prop tree up with something, so my club could hold it from there......But yeah, you get it

    WigerToods2010:
    Not sure if you meant the jazz pants or Rory "enjoying the sound of running water" in the background...

    You know, I never saw him. You're not wrong though, he does look like Rory & relaxing strangely over there. At the very least, taking a counting of balls, in his possession

    This is a very good rendition of the four of us.

    Erik on the left with all the boom sticks at the ready

    Wayne checking his shaft for stiffness. After all, the first one has to count......

    I've got the omnipotent ball of knowledge, just no idea what I am supposed to do with it.

    Mike is ready with the old "Double Tap" scenario. Always double tap.

    Yeah, I would say you hit that spot on Johnny.

    Bring your scythe, you can be Kronos, out on vacation from Tartarus......

    ☢-------------------<*{{{{{-(

    Digg
    Delicious
  • whooshdangit United Kingdom
    1,118 Posts
    Tue, Nov 6 2018 3:34 PM

    Hi Gents

    Superb! Looks like you had a blast.

    gonfission:

    I THINK, no proof, however, he managed to put this bad daddy on the green for a par, from that very spot.. WTF!?

    Possibly a rare shot of Wayne's toe wedge in action. A thing of beauty.

    gonfission:

    Well, at least till the shot that stood the golfing community on it's head, happened. In complete wonderment, we all just shook our heads, wondering, if what had just transpired, was actually real. I am prone to a few LSD flashbacks, on occasion, so, I could not be sure, I was witnessing reality.

    After witnessing what you did on the second tee it could have been an episode of PTSD. Dangit!! I can hear those pants this side of the pond   : )

    Great write up, thanks. It's reading things like this that make me wish I was a golfer. Not sure if that's good or bad . . .

    Cheers!

    Rich

     

     

    Digg
    Delicious
  • alanti Australia
    10,300 Posts
    Sat, Nov 10 2018 10:22 PM
    That is a brilliant read Joe - laughed my lily white butt off........scenic routes and mandatory warning for anyone setting sight on those pants, sounded like one hell of a great day. Good times.
    Digg
    Delicious
  • conveyorguy United States
    625 Posts
    Fri, Nov 16 2018 5:36 PM

    bumpity-bump

    Digg
    Delicious
RSS