I made it to 30!! ( Years of age )
Some days I was sure I would never. I have however, a small yet insidious problem with which to contend. In fact, it is rather more invidious than sidious but which either way it has to do with the buttons on my jacket scraping the desk as I type, although in some ways, I rather believe I should get over it without a wholesome struggle given that at sea, far worse things could occur. Such as catching your watch whilst passing through gangways made narrow due to space restraint, even if you have worn it quite a lot and should rightly be completely used to its sticking outness. Time to dwell on that later I thought, but rather too late for it to matter, if to matter was any matter at all.
I am afraid I rather exceeded myself over the summer, but don't let me spoil the surprise I felt whilst in the cinema at Lowestoft, it was sunny and I spilled a perfectly good take-away coffee on that bench in the pedestrian walkway- not the one where the thug stamped on a pigeon in 2009 and I slapped him, but the one where the man with tattoos and large mouth was talking about his last trip to Holland with his wife while she listened listless because they were married and I fancy she was thinking of some way to nag him by intertrupting inconveniently as would I have been doing, if indeed I hadn't already just turned my pretty head and walked away. Even if it is now a bob-cut after the chemotherapy and ensuing bald as a smooth coots egg.
Well it's not really a bob-cut as such, more a bob-grow, as that's just how it fashioned itself on it's own.
So anyway as if a week on the cruiser wasn't enough, which it wasn't, I ended up taking to the sea once more with "Sweet Jane" bless her fin keel, which is a wholesome different story to Broads in Norfolk, separated at birth one might surmise, and the common nedominator being wet and watery.
And that's why I have to leave WGT because having moved by sail from Devon to Scotland the whole Yacht, it seemed too ridiculously easy not to stay to Scotland and live forever, my leaukaemia permitting, and other sundry things like mortality but at least I made 30 anni which my last employ was not proper good at promising. Sort of explains why I resigned my commission in a confusing way, and to BobX1 and Billcliff from my first CC, The Derbyshire, I say sorry because you both always supported me and wanted to see me in Uniform.
After being ravished by sun hot enough to fry bacon on my belly with ( except for the coconut taste from the UV blocker the Doctors forced me to wear) and being chased by dolphins and impersonating porpii, who by the way stayed with me from Pembroke to Harlech, I steered into Menai where I would have met with Sdorr and Strangemagik if only I had said, but I feared Andyson Inc. pty. might have come up with target acquisition by then, and sold it to USA Ltd for vast sums of dolopoly money with which, if he had been burgled and the robber knew how to spend it, it is entirely possible some of the proceeds would have found their way in to the Custard concession racket at most Comprehensives and some High Schools, and I simply could not have lived with that.
I'll tell you whatty, The Irish Sea is no rollover, even on a calm bright day with a beaufort 4 the waves tremendered on the beam like as if Liverpool had angered them, or maybe it was Morecombe because that nice chippy shut down two years ago, and the man in the computer shop asked me for ID, in which case, the waves were entirely and with my blessing, justified.
To cut short a long story, much to Sweetiepies relief, I arrived in timely manner on the Western shores of Scotland, where I am to make my new home. More literally than I first intended, but heck, I have Lambert and Cook and the stable lad at my side, so I shan't be too long, and the timber is my own.
I have been given five years by the medics all being well, so I need to make the most of that that I may and that's one more reason I wont be able to continue here. That and the fact that where I shall be does not have internet availability...
So it's goodbye, adieu, arrivederci to all the people I knew;
Mio- Out drove me but I drove you nuts right? :-) It's time to Free Mio wgt...
Strangemagik- The original trefogulator
Ike (WGTicon) - You made me wriggle when you talked sexy food and tables
Chad (MisterWGT)- Who never did get the helicopter pics
CS- Nailing StA 17 Eagle
Lyra- My self inflicted nemesis (all those hours of me teaching and what? you BEAT me? Pfft)
Welshspitfire- Who rose and grew despite hating golf
Yancycan- He really CAN you know
Andyson- Such a gentle sweet man with a heart to match his humour
Renn- Life bane to YankeeJim, who loves you really Renn
Sdorr- who laughed with socks on or off
So many others- Without you, I could not say goodbye, and mean it
To the legions of friends whose names will stay in my heart, not for their golf prowess, but for giving me a beautiful reason to exist
And to those whom I upset and angered- Tough
To the WGT staffers- You read my emails, that was enough
To the prattlers and the mighty mouths, the self deluded and less than dumb- You were made to entertain in the forums, never stop
I love you all, but no warts please, I already have my Princess.
From time to time I will visit the Folks in Devon and if WGT still is here, will pop in through the cat flap for a natter and a bowl of cream.
Lizzie xx
The End