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Who will have the last word?

Sat, Jan 18 2020 2:57 AM by craigswan. 8,215 replies.
  • BIGAL123 United States
    145 Posts
    Tue, Aug 13 2019 5:23 PM

    What will we do if he does not come back from vacation...........

     

    Getting the right result

    “You’re late on the tee, John.”

    “Yes, well being a Sunday, I had to toss a coin to see if I should

    go to church or go and play golf.”

    “Okay, but why are you so late?”

    “I had to toss it 15 times!”

  • craigswan United Kingdom
    15,710 Posts
    Sun, Sep 1 2019 11:15 AM

    I,M BACK .

    just missed hurricane dorian .

    it s heading north so Orlando airport is shut instead of Miami .

    No water or gas left anywhere .

  • craigswan United Kingdom
    15,710 Posts
    Sun, Sep 1 2019 11:16 AM

    Thanks for missing me bigal .

    Feel free to join in anytime .

  • craigswan United Kingdom
    15,710 Posts
    Mon, Sep 2 2019 5:03 AM

    Word of the day: BORIS-NORIS (19th century) - to go on blindly, without any thought of risk or decency.

     

    I guess at some point this got Americanized to Willy-Nilly.

  • craigswan United Kingdom
    15,710 Posts
    Mon, Sep 2 2019 5:18 AM

    There is a company in Alaska that dispatches pizzas by aeroplane to customers in remote locations. Delivery is free..

    “Delivery is free” but the pizzas cost $6,000.

  • craigswan United Kingdom
    15,710 Posts
    Tue, Sep 3 2019 2:11 AM

    3 weeks away and how easy it is to be rubbish again .

    Forgotten every good roll on the courses.

    How did Oakmont get reinstated then .

    Because wgt will not let me sign in to my account oversea's I played for 3 weeks on the I-pad .

    Couldn't get my head around that . I need a mouse .

  • craigswan United Kingdom
    15,710 Posts
    Tue, Sep 3 2019 2:14 AM

    In 2017, a Floridian lawyer defending a client accused of arson had his trousers catch on fire in court..

    As in lawyer, lawyer, pants on fire...

    an elaborate and rather dangerous ploy to validate his client’s defence of spontaneous combustion.

     

     

  • craigswan United Kingdom
    15,710 Posts
    Tue, Sep 3 2019 2:19 AM

    It takes more time to microwave a lasagne, according to packet instructions, than it does to get into space.

    That's just obscene! Who in their right mind would microwave lasagne?

    A better idea Is to chuck out the microwave lasagne And eat the box instead.

  • craigswan United Kingdom
    15,710 Posts
    Tue, Sep 3 2019 3:11 AM

    My wife left me because I am insecure .

    No wait, she's back. She just went to get coffee..

  • craigswan United Kingdom
    15,710 Posts
    Tue, Sep 3 2019 3:11 AM

    My wife left me because I am insecure .

    No wait, she's back. She just went to get coffee..

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